I’m not the pretty one

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These are words I heard from my ten year old daughters this week. It was brutality painful to hear these words come out of her mouth. My gut turned and quickly I did what I think most parents would do, I corrected the statement and reminded her that she shouldn’t listen to what anyone says about her. We hugged, she cried, and we went on our way. But something felt off.

It was hard to pinpoint but I knew deep inside that I needed to do something else. For the last few years we hadn’t dealt with much of this. Honestly, I can only think of one other time, when Alex was in 1st grade. A little boy told Alex she wasn’t smart, to which I replied,”Oh yeah, well you tell him that I saw him eating crayons and I don’t think that’s very smart!”. It’s safe to say I’ve come a long way in my parenting 😉 But times were changing. In the last year I’ve heard her say more and more things about her looks and what her friends think. I knew I needed to try something different.

It was tough for me though because when I look at her, I see beauty. I think she is so beautiful. But more importantly, aside from her physical beautiful, I see the true beauty in her heart. Everything that makes her, her. She is so kind and compassionate. She loves loving people, including people, developing new and deep friendships. She is very smart and is doing great academically. She is funny and witty which I super love because I pride myself on being both of those things. She is independent, probably the most independent ten year old I’ve ever meet. She is strong/tough and pretty stinking fast. We’ve raced a couple of times and she gives me a run for my money. She is just so great! I could go on and on about all the things that make her beautiful but I so desperately want her to see them, not just hear them.

I knew that I needed to show her these things, without directly telling her. So that’s what I did. I spent as much time as I could with her this weekend just trying to highlight all the things that make her great. And in picture form, I tried to highlight her athleticism, her funny, carefree nature, and beauty all in a few photos. I wanted her to see for herself that she is great even if some people may not think so. I’m so thankful for photography and all the skills I’m learning because to me it’s more than just photos. In this case it’s evidence that my daughter is pretty amazing and my hope is that she can see that for herself. #strongisthenewpretty

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-SJ

Shootalong Lesson 3: Aperture/focus

2 Comments on “I’m not the pretty one

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